Hamburger paragraphs don't work!

The title of this essay is not “Hamburger Paragraphs are not Fun” or “Hamburger Paragraphs are not Colorful.” They are fun and they are colorful. They just don’t work.

NO CONNECTION

The thing about teaching writing, the thing about teaching paragraphs, the thing about teaching paragraph writing to children, is that you must teach how ideas are connected.

Nothing in a hamburger is connected. A bun is not connected to meat. Lettuce and buns have no connection. An onion is nothing like mustard. There is no connection between the parts. In other words, you are teaching kids that you take all kinds of things which are not connected, and you put them together. The parts in a hamburger do go well together, but they are not connected when separated. There is a difference. Hamburgers do not teach coherence and they do not teach unity.

To a child, any detail can be lettuce; any detail can be a tomato. The bun does enclose all the inner contents, but so does a box. In fact, I would say the box the burger came in does a better job of teaching paragraph structure than the bun does.

The main problem for students who don’t write fantastic paragraphs… and well-structured multi-paragraph essays is that they do not see how ideas are connected. Ask your students. This is what they don’t get.

Okay, let’s look at the hamburger and see how students REALLY connect the ideas:

• Bun – I went to the park with my family.
• Onions – Playing on the swings is so much fun.
• Tomatoes – Going to the movies is also fun.
• Lettuce – Johnny, my best friend, is going to have a movie party for his birthday.
• Burger – For my next birthday I want to have a pizza party.
• Bun – For my last birthday we went to the park. It was fun.

Can you see the reasoning of how children connect ideas? Can you see how ideas connected incorrectly are one of the greatest problems in student writing?

Four Details in a Box

This is silly, but yet I guarantee this will work better, work faster, and with better comprehension than the hamburger. (I don’t teach this or use this. Go to the homepage to check out the writing program.)

Okay kids, this is a box. The box is your trip to the park. Put four details about your trip to the park in the box. Put the lid on. Now, write your paragraph.

Do you want to be creative? Make each detail a separate color. If two details are connected, make them the same color.

Want to take it to the next level? “Okay kids, we have five boxes here, one stacked on top of the other. We are going to write an essay.”

At least “Four Details in a Box” does not MIS-TEACH. (Actually, I kind of like “Four Details in a Box.” I just came up with it. I’m going to use it… WITH THE COLORS.)

However, it is still teaching things as unconnected. It does not REALLY connect ideas. (Go to the homepage and check out, “Pattern Based Writing: Quick and Easy Essay!”)

Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP) – How the Brian Organizes Ideas and Creates Meaning

What I like about “Four Detail in a Box” is the hands on aspect and the visual colors aspect. I’ve studied quite a bit about NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming.) About a third of NLP deals with VAK (Visual, Auditory, and Kinesthetic.)

On a side note, we are all visual, auditory, and kinesthetic, and if you really want to tell what MODE a person is in, listen to their words as they speak. Their words will REALLY REVEAL whether they are in a visual, auditory, or kinesthetic mood, mode… or state.

About, another 50% of NLP has to do with patterns found in language. Not just spoken and written language, but about how the brain organizes thoughts and ideas creating meaning. CONNECTIONS!

How are you teaching writing? Are you looking for a faster, more effective way? If so, check out the writing program!

In Defense of the Hamburger Paragraph

I cannot guarantee 100% that I will never, ever mention the hamburger or sandwich when talking about paragraphs or essays. I doubt I ever will, but if I ever end up in a 1st grade class, or possibly as 2nd grade class, I might. It can work nicely as in introduction to paragraphs.

Here are a Couple Pros of the Hamburger Paragraph:

• It is visual. Small children will see the structure of a paragraph, even though they won’t understand how the ideas are connected. In this sense it does work as “a first introduction to paragraphs.”

• There are some fun kinesthetic activities you can do with young kids.

• The hamburger/sandwich talk can be fun and engaging; however my experience is that beyond that it doesn’t build any real understanding which helps kids understand why their paragraphs work or don’t work.

In Conclusion

Alexander Bain outlined the rules for paragraphs in 1871. I have a feeling in 1872 someone invented both the sandwich and the hamburger paragraph. If the hamburger did work, the issue of paragraph writing would never be an issue after 3rd or 4th grade. Has that been your experience? (Pattern Based Writing: Quick and Easy Essay!)

• In High School, I was “taught” to write five-paragraph essays (and when I say “taught,” I mean “forced.”) The five-paragraph essay was the only form allowed in Sophomore English class.
• I hope it’s not taught anymore.
• -my daughter hated it. She would have crying fits each and every time.

Global warming, the budget deficit, budget cuts, taxes, conservatives, liberals, rap music… yes people get very emotional over hot topics. I just was not aware that the five-paragraph essay fell into this category.

Five-Paragraph Essay Advice given… but was it Taken?

When taking the CBEST test to become a teacher, an experienced teacher told me, “Just write a five-paragraph essay. Don’t write about anything you care about. Introduction, three paragraphs, conclusion… that’s it. Nothing more! Remember, don’t write about anything you care about!”

Did I follow that advice? No. I’m not going to write about something I don’t care about. However, half way into the CBEST essay section, those words of… advice… came echoing through my frustration. I was lost. I was in over my head. I was in a heated state of passion… and I was going to prove my point. Hmm, what is my point? Where am I headed? How am I going to finish this? What am I trying to say?

Well, I got out of that jam… and I’m happy to say I received a great grade. My position is that writing about something you care about always pays off. However, that advice stuck in my mind long after that test and influenced how I taught writing once I became a teacher. 

Wikipedia Describes the Five-Paragraph Essay

The five-paragraph essay is a form of written argument. It is a common requisite in assignments in middle school, high school, and university and sometimes elementary school. The format requires an essay to have five paragraphs: one introductory paragraph, three body paragraphs with support and development, and one concluding paragraph. Because of this structure, it is also known as a hamburger essay or a three tier essay. Recently, a simpler version of the five paragraph essay, called the Painted EssayTM, has been designed as a pedagogical tool for elementary school teachers. The Painted EssayTM combines the traditional structure of the five paragraph essay with color, activity and oral practice to teach younger students about the relationship among the components of a well written piece.

The five-paragraph essay format is also applied to speech making, with some college classes teaching the five-paragraph format, along with an organized system of outlining and pre-writing the speech.  

That’s the five-paragraph essay in a nutshell! That does not seem like it should get anyone hot under the collar. What cause is there to be against teaching the five-paragraph essay? Before you answer that question… ask yourself these questions:

1. Are you also against paragraph form?
2. Are you also against beginning, middles and endings?
3. Are you also against introductions, bodies, and conclusions?
4. Are you in favor of rambling and pointless essays?

Based on what the Wiki says… as well as my personal answers to those four questions, I am taking a stand. THE FIVE-PARAGRAPH ESSAY MUST BE TAUGHT! There… I said it!

Teaching the 5-paragraph essay teaches students that:

1. They must write in paragraph form.
2. They must have a beginning, middle and ending.
3. A beginning, middle and ending is essentially the same thing as an introduction, body, and conclusion.
4. They cannot ramble. They must be headed in a direction and get there.

The five-paragraph essay is the easiest, fastest, and best way to teach all this. It teaches GOOD THINKING. I have to admit, I’m not as much a fan of “five-paragraph essay writing” as I am a fan of “FIVE-PARAGRAPH ESSAY THINKING.”

So the Remaining Issues are:
• When?
• For how long?

1. When must the 5-paragraph essay be taught?
2. For how long must students write in 5-paragraph essay format?

The 5-paragraph essay is “essays for beginners.” All students past a certain age should be able to write a 5-paragraph essay at the drop of a hat. What is that certain age? I think it should be mastered in elementary school, but only because it CAN be mastered in elementary school. It definitely should not be an issue in high school for any student.

Even though the 5-paragraph essay is “essays for beginners” it is okay if there is still a strong emphasis put on it in high school and in college. That’s fine… but in high school and in college it should be the equivalent of knowing your multiplication tables. Students should be able to whip one out in nothing flat.

The five-paragraph essay is a tool. It is not an end in itself. The greatest benefit that comes from being able to write “the five-paragraph essay” is the awareness of “five-paragraph essay thinking.”

 “Five-paragraph essay thinking” provides value for a lifetime. Whether you are giving a speech or…  whatever task one is doing… being aware of how things tie together, where you are headed, and how you will wrap things up… will always be “in style.”

If your students write three paragraphs, seven paragraphs or fifteen paragraphs… with “five paragraph essay thinking” GREAT! If you will only accept five paragraphs, nothing more or less, your students will eventually feel as the people at the top of this page felt.

In short “five paragraph essay THINKING” is always rewarded and in style. Do you know how to teach your students to THINK in five-paragraph essay format? (“Pattern Based Writing” does!)